For years the poor depictions of vampires has bugged me. Every single ticme a writer decides to write a vampire story, the first thing they seem to do is to invent their own interpretation of what vampires are without any regard for stuff like, I dunno, what's physically possible, logic, common sense. So I've decided that I'm going to go through what is in my opinion some of the worst offenders starting with the one I'm watching at the moment, the HBO television series True Blood.
True Blood, apparently is the adaptation of a series of books and seems to follow a pretty standard version of vampire mythology. All the usual illogical nonsense is here, living forever, burned by sunlight and silver, can't come in unless their invited the usual. The vampires all have ridiculously superhuman strength and speed as well. The elongated teeth are here, and yes they call them fangs *cringe* like a lot of other depictions they elongate the lateral incisors rather than the canines, i suppose they reckon it looks better on camera and to top it off, how convenient, they're retractable!! And also my biggest pet hate, uncontrollable addiction to blood. No one ever seems to consider that if vampires really were like that, then the human race would have probably been wiped out before the fucking pyramids were built!!
It's not all bad for True Blood though, they have introduced the idea of a hierarchy, a sort of organisation. This at least means that the writers have some sense, however, their hierarchy has brought vampires out in the public eye. Like that would ever happen.
True Blood does make me cringe a bit, especially now when there seems to be about a dozen different types of supernatural beings, but even if their interpretation of vampires is massively flawed, it's still pretty entertaining.
Next time I think I'll tackle the Lost Boys
Thanks for reading
